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The Renku Sessions: Salmon Run – Week 2

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Hello, renku friends. I am John Stevenson and I will be leading you in a brief, twelve verse renku before Kala Ramesh starts her session in February.

For verses that require a kigo (formal season word or phrase) we will be using The Five Hundred Essential Japanese Season Words: https://thehaikufoundation.org/omeka/items/show/821

 

I have tried to clarify, in previous sessions, the differences between renku verses and haiku. Since we have new participants joining us, most of whom have been writing haiku, I have tried to write to some of you individually, but it can be hard to keep up with that. So, let me just say again, for everyone’s benefit, that a renku verse (other than the first verse – hokku) is not a haiku and must not have the two-part structure of a haiku. The first challenge of collaborative verse is to let go of the habit of writing a complete, stand-alone poem. A renku verse looks upon the space between verses as functioning like the cut within a haiku and provides a single phrase. That phrase, in turn, is altered poetically by a next verse, which is also a single phrase and not a complete poem.

 

Here is my short list for the second verse:

 

harvest moon’s
full circle

Beth Ramos

 

a second moon appears
as the drawbridge opens

Sean Murphy

 

ripples
in the moon’s twin

Kati Mohr

 

the moon through
overhanging leaves

Richard Straw

 

a halo
rounds the moon

Belinda Behne

 

glints of moonlight
stipple the bear’s fur

Kristen Lindquist

 

moonshine lights
the bubble tent for two

Milan Rajkumar

 

myriad moons
among the rocks

Joshua St. Claire

 

bears watch and wait
under the bright moon

Debbie Feller

 

the moon the whole moon
and nothing but the moon

Michael Henry Lee

 

howls bouncing off
the autumn moon

Dan Capbell

 

passengers moon viewing
from the ferry boat

Carol Jones

 

slowly, the moon floats by
the lily pads

Lorin Ford

 

the same full moon
our parents saw

Keith Evetts

 

stepping-stones
tonsured by the moon

Keith Evetts

 

a moon lit path
parting the field

Anne Fox

 

closing the circle
under the autumn moon

Andrew Pineo

 

we join the day moon
in working all hours

Laurie Greer

 

crescent moon
clearing the fence

Orense Nicod

 

the moon dips into
a river of stars

Jonathan Alderfer

 

moonlit maple leaf
in a river eddy

Margaret Anderson

 

the moon passes
through Pisces again

Sally Biggar

 

harvest moon captured
in a reverse eddy

Lyle Smith

 

campfire smoke
drifts across the moon

VJ Green

 

mackerel clouds gather
beneath a rising moon

rob barkan

 

a squirrel’s cache of truffles
underneath the digging moon

madeleine kavanagh

 

A majority of these short list verses would be excellent choices here. I feel as if, as a group, we have all turned a corner and are working with a good understanding of how renku are meant to function.

The sad part, of course, is that I will have to pass over so many excellent offers. Here is my choice, like one of  a beautiful bounty of salmon:

 

crescent moon
clearing the fence

Orense Nicod

 

I see in the crescent moon the shape of a leaping salmon and the fence as one of the obstacles ahead. These parallels make for a close linkage with the hokku while broadening the opening scene. At the same time, they enhance the “rest” of the hokku, with the moon’s clearing of a fence a quiet, slow-motion version of the salmon run to come.

 

Here is our renku, so far:

 

Salmon Run – A Twelve Verse Renku

 

a brief rest
before the rapids
salmon run

Sally Biggar

 

crescent moon
clearing the fence

Orense Nicod

 

This week we will be writing the three-line third verse. This will be a non-seasonal verse. It must not contain anything from our list of seasonal words and phrases. And, while linking to verse two, it should be a sharp departure from our first two verses, in content, setting and tone. The salmon run, figuratively, begins now. The rest of the way should feature fabulous leaps!

 

Please use the submission box, below to enter up to five of your verses. Submissions will be closed at midnight, eastern US time, on Monday, November 24. My selection of a third verse and instructions for the fourth verse will appear here on Thursday, November 27.

Looking forward to your offers!

John

 

 

 

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