The Renku Sessions: Salmon Run – Week 4

Hello, renku friends. I am John Stevenson and I will be leading you in a brief, twelve verse renku before Kala Ramesh starts her session in February.

For verses that require a kigo (formal season word or phrase) we will be using The Five Hundred Essential Japanese Season Words: https://thehaikufoundation.org/omeka/items/show/821

Here is my short list for the fourth verse:

losing hope
along with medicare

Sean Murphy

using the bully pulpit
to be a bully

Pamela Garry

a white washcloth
stained with makeup

Kristen Lindquist

replay after replay
of Give Peace a Chance

Lorin Ford

so i can see my baby
when i leave this’a world

Michael Henry Lee

denial anger bargaining
depression acceptance

Joshua St. Claire

the echo
of slave chants

Abigail Friedman

towards a destiny
written in DNA

Urszula Marciniak

the many venues
of peace talks

Andrew Pineo

the same old same old
in the memory care unit

Richard Straw

the monitor’s
beeps in ICU

Richard Straw

pleading for a story
about the banshee

Marion Clarke

half a quote
on the tip of my tongue

Orense Nicod

father scolds me
in my dream

Christopher Seep

high-rise
elevator

Jim DeLong

welcome
to the throwaway world

Pauline O’Carolan

no more grants for under-
studied wildlife

Laurie Greer

the weight of the world
still 13 septillion pounds

Anne Fox

another party
ends in gunfire

Tracy Davidson

searching for the gifts
I hid too carefully

Belinda Behne

Nothing but
his empty gaze

Evan Spivack

dealt a green card
in immigration poker

Martina Matijević

in my coffee the
aftertaste of consumption

Melissa Dennison

a toddler giggles
at the hand shadows

Biswajit Mishra

too spicy
for me

Diana Ming Jeong

automated applause
after his post

Margaret Anderson

three weird sisters toiling
in the scottish play

madeleine kavanagh

weather delays keep
the airport chairs full

Nancy Brady

how long
do i have

wendy c. bialek

a molehill is a big deal
to a mole

Jonathan Alderfer

the crinkle of paper
in the scrapbook

Debbie Scheving

A few words about what is on my short lists. I wish I could say that there was a consistent plan or standard applied to deciding what is included and what is not. It is too subjective for that. I work on it every day between the Thursday postings and the day after the Monday submission deadlines and I feel certain that I’m a better reader on some days than on others.

There are, however, a few factors that are quite uniformly applied. One is my awareness that there are certain types of verses yet to appear in the renku; love verses and a blossom verse, for example. I consistently steer away from anything in these areas before it has been requested.

Another factor is the ongoing offers of verses that are written like haiku. Renku verses, other than the hokku, are not haiku. The soul of collaborative writing is resisting the urge to offer a complete poem.

And then there is the question of seasonal verse. Kigo are formal rather than intuitive. When a seasonal verse is called for, it must contain an appropriate word or image from the list we are using. On the other hand, seasonality (even without a formal kigo) must be avoided in non-seasonal renku verses. For instance, “black Friday” is not a kigo from our list but , being the day after American Thanksgiving, it does indicate late autumn or late spring.

Finally, there is the factor of repeating the same linking principle in a series of verses. In our current renku, verses two and three are linked by sources of light. We will not want another verse linked in the same way.

Here is my choice for the fourth verse:

the echo
of slave chants

Abigail Friedman

Once again, there were many tempting offers. I’m going to make it a regular part of my commentary to recognize a few of them.

wendy c. bialek’s “how long / do I have” strikes me as simple and profound. I may, however, want to save first person verses for possible use in a love verse.

Richard Straw’s “the same old same old / in the memory care unit” strikes me as emotionally complex and offering a variety of linking options.

Joshua St. Claire’s “denial anger bargaining / depression acceptance” would offer us the science of psychology and emotional states as new topics.

My actual choice, by Abigail Friedman, seems to link to the idea of keeping something alive. And to keeping it alive through art. It also links “ghost” to “soul.” And, at least for American readers, it raises the topic of history in a profound way. At a technical level, it features the sense of hearing and we will want verses that give us the full array of the senses. I also see a link between the vast empty space of a dark theater and the vaster emptiness of millions of thwarted lives.

Here is our renku, so far:

Salmon Run – A Twelve Verse Renku

a brief rest
before the rapids
salmon run

Sally Biggar

crescent moon
clearing the fence

Orense Nicod

a ghost light
keeping the stage
alive

scott anderson

the echo
of slave chants

Abigail Friedman

This week we will be writing the three-line fifth verse. This will be a winter verse. It must contain a winter kigo from our list of seasonal words and phrases.

We will be writing a pair of love verses next but, for now, avoid anything that would suggest that topic.

Please use the submission box, below to enter up to five of your verses. Submissions will be closed at midnight, eastern US time, on Monday, December 8. My selection of a fifth verse and instructions for the sixth verse will appear here on Thursday, December 11.

Keep up the good work!

John

THF strives to maintain a safe and friendly environment for our readers and site participants. Participation in our offerings assumes respectful and appropriate behavior of all parties. We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone, for any reason, at any time. 

If you see something you feel may violate our Code of Conduct, please report it to the appropriate moderator or the President here.