The Renku Sessions: Purple Haze – Week 2
Hi, everyone,
I’m Kala Ramesh from India, and I’m your sabaki for this renku.
We are writing a Junicho – 12-verse renku (linked verses), and we are on to our third verse.
If you want to read my introduction to this renku, I’ve given you the link below:
Intro: https://thehaikufoundation.org/the-renku-sessions-invitation-2/
1st week – Hokku: https://thehaikufoundation.org/the-renku-sessions-purple-haze-week-1/
The schema:
Junicho: a twelve-verse renku (collaborative poetry)
hokku – spring blossom
wakiku – spring
daisan – cut away verse – no season (ns)
4 short – ns
5 long – summer
6 short – love ns
7 long – love winter
8 short – ns
9 long – end summer (monsoon in India!)
10 short – ns
11 long – autumn moon
12 short – ageku – autumn
*Please remember: you need to offer blossom, moon, love, season verses, and so on, only during the specific slots given in the schema.
Wakiku: second verse.
Poems were submitted by 38 poets, totaling 100-plus poems
Even with some beautiful offers, quite a few were not suitable for the wakiku slot, because:
- Many had sent verses written on blossoms. Remember, the hokku was the only blossom verse in this renku.
I said at the beginning that the blossom, moon, love, and rain verses would follow the schema. Please remember that in renku we don’t look back, so each verse should move forward. This is a challenge, but a rewarding one, as it will help us better understand haikai poetry.
See the logic behind this so-called rule.
If I select a waki with rain or raindrops, when we reach the ninth slot, which is monsoon (see the schema above), that verse will connect back to wakiku. That’s a big ‘no-no’.
I repeat: in renku, we don’t look back; each verse should move forward. It’s a beautiful guideline.
- In such a small renku form, there cannot be two verses on blossom. Nor can we have verses mentioning any other season than the one requested. With all this in mind, the sabaki (the lead poet) has to make a calculated choice for each slot.
In this Junicho, the wakiku is a spring verse. There were many lovely verses, but I couldn’t select them because they were either without a season, set in seasons other than ‘spring’, or mentioned ‘blossoms’ again!
3. The Waki has to buttress the hokku. It should be in the same vicinity as the hokku. A few had shifted the scene to the interior of a house.
The poems shortlisted for this hokku were:
the painter hastily sets up
his easel in the young grass
Urszula Marciniak
*
the girl in a pink dress
sits blowing soap bubbles
Pauline O’Carolan
*
butterflies emerge
from the woodpile
Carol Jones
*
hues of tadpoles
in the shade
Carol Jones
*
the skylark ascending
straight into the blue
Pauline O’Carolan
*
our roof
is a kite magnet
Dan Campbell
*
the last patch of melting snow
becomes a memory
Tracy Davidson
*
the groundskeeper sharpens
the blades of his mower
andrew shimield
*
After careful observation and analysis, the verse selected for waki is:
purple haze
sunlight filters through
jacaranda branches Pauline O’ Carolan
a flight of butterflies
on the wood corral John Daleiden
The hokku delightfully paints a fresh, rejuvenating picture for us. We see the sun’s slanting rays reaching the earth as they pass through the jacaranda branches. There is a wood corral, an enclosure constructed from wood—typically cedar, pine, or treated lumber—designed to contain livestock like horses or cattle.
And here, caught at the right moment, we have a ‘flight of butterflies’
Ha! What a satisfying early morning scene.
John’s waki closely buttresses Pauline’s hokku.
Remember, renku, with all the parts coming together, is almost a painting, we are attempting.
The toriawase (I spoke about in my introduction is important and plays a major role in how the verses are chosen.)
Now, we come to our third slot – daisan – a CUT AWAY verse.
As much as hokku and wakiku stick close together to lay a strong foundation for the masterpiece we are creating, the daisan breaks away!
1. A three-line verse with 13 or 14 syllables (if possible!), but it’s not a two-image poem. It needs to be a sentence broken into three lines!!
2. It’s a NO-SEASON verse.
3. The daisan may be considered the first real verse of the renku, as it is the first instance that links to the second verse (wakiku) and shifts away from the first verse (hokku).
4. Introduce a new subject or theme.
5. Having already had the hokku and wakiku situated outdoors, shall we move the daisan indoors?
- Don’t repeat any word or image already present.
Go for it!
I’ve always enjoyed writing a daisan.
your sabaki,
_kala
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